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Writer's pictureYani Tamar

ATTN: LADIES, STOP DOING THIS IN 2019...CHASING MEN!!!!

Ladies, can we STOP doing this in 2019, please. You ladies know what I'm talking about. You lose sleep over it, cry tears, rock yourselves to sleep at night, have dreams about it, it makes you bitter and angry with men and love, and it can be quite damaging. You know what I'm talking about, "CHASING A MAN." It's a horrible feeling to feel like you are so close, yet so far. STOP IT!! That **ish hurts and ends up doing way more damage than the initial rejection in the first place. I know we have all done it once in our lifetime whether it was in elementary school, or well up into our adult years. God forbid, you give up that magical triangle that sits in between your legs. Let's be real Y'all, (if I can be candid) I'm going to tell you how my mother told me "LOVE IS IN THE NUT!" Sounds crazy, I know, but now you've really fallen hard because you've personally made an investment on him.

It's a horrible feeling to chase after someone who genuinely doesn't want you and SHOWS you exactly how he feels about you. We need to dump this mentality of less than because you are worth so much more than a late night phone call or dinner here and there. You are a goddess, a queen, and a phenomenal woman who has literally everything to offer and you deserve the love that you are trying to give to someone else a hundred times over. It is not your job to chase anyone, you can scratch up your knees (I'm joking), but seriously that's not your job. You'll know when you've had enough. Only you can decide to stop, and get up and shake the dust off your feet. If that young man wants to be with you trust me, he will, and he will fight for you and SHOW you exactly how he FEELS about you. It hurts my heart to think I was going to for less than what I thought I deserved.

Do you know that when a man marries a woman he gets a blessing released over his life just because you're there? You're genuinely precious to God, and he cares about you being taken care of. The flip side of that is he wins because YOU are there! I think that is enough to hold our head high in confidence knowing the value that you add to his life. Which brings me to another point, that I at one point adopted the ideology along with a lot of other women, we shouldn't let what a man can do for us have dominance over genuine love, affection, adoration, and appreciation for the value that you add to his life.

Now, I'm not saying date below what you feel as though you deserve, but rather be open minded to real love. We shouldn't abandon real love because it wasn't presented to us the way we thought it would be presented to us in our head. Say, for example, you want a man with millions, that's all fine and dandy, but what if God was waiting for you to get with him to give him millions. What if God's intention was for them to grow and stack together? He that finds a wife finds a good thing. Metaphorically speaking, what if you were attached to his blessing? No one is saying, FIND STRUGGLE LOVE. Struggling together is not the goal, but it does happen. Just don't pass up on real love because he wasn't what you thought.

Love you, Ladies! Go Glow!!!

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